Captains log, day #952

We’ve been at sea for what feels like decades. I’m forgetting what people’s faces look like. The seas have been turbulent and unforgiving. We had to kill Jim. Yup, Jim’s dead. Not really sure how he got on our boat, but we put 2 between his ears and tossed his lifeless corpse overboard. Mertha caught scruvy and we had to remove his left foot. It bled like a sonbitch but it wasn’t anything a hot iron and a little rum couldn’t fix. Speaking of rum, supplies are running low. Men have started to form alliances over the last few bottles remaining. I’ve stashed 6 bottles in my trunk so that I may remain neutral and avoid any possible mutiny. Crazy eyed Bobby was looking a little extra crazy the past week and I do not test his levels of craziness. We’ve been eating seal blubber in between meals to keep ourselves satiated. Fun fact: the blubber also acts as fuel for our lanterns. Most of the food is gone, but there are plenty of fish in the sea, amirite? I’ve grown sick of the constant questions… “Where are we headed?” “When will we get there?” “What’s wrong with the wifi?” I never should have become a cruise line captain.

Mental health phone lines calls are up roughly 700%. No shit? What’s the number…?

It’s day 21 for me. 3 weeks where I’ve been spending 23 hours of my day inside my home. I love this place. We work hard to keep it clean, organized, feng shui’ed… okay, my lovely little lady does. Regardless, as much as I love being home, I think I’ve had my fill for the next 6 months.

They say you don’t realize what you’ve got until it’s gone… I suppose I just never realized how much of a privilege it was to be in a community. All those times that I chose to ignore a friend and stay home, those times I stayed indoors on a beautiful day, and all those times I had to go to the store to get something. UGH, what pains in the asses.

Again, I’m grateful for my health, my beautiful other half, a wonderful home to be quarantined in, and much more. This could be a literal prison. There could be no computer, no internet, no choices, no space. Continue to be grateful for what we have, it could always be worse.

The way I’m seeing it – we have a little over 3 more weeks here in MA. 3 are already over. It’s about halfway over and then we can all celebrate. The day that the pandemic is declared over will be the day that the world celebrates as one. I’m looking forward to that day as it’ll feel like a literal weight off my chest.

You know what else? We watched Detective Pikachu last night. I’m grateful that HBO threw out some free content… but I’ll give it a “Eh.” Eh-nterttaining. So thank you again, HBO and everyone behind the making of that movie.

I think that’s it.


Happy friday everyone.

About krisoakey

Simply a man playfully chasing enlightenment while encouraging others to join him through mockery, logical anomalies, and hand holding...LOTS of hand holding
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