Ed and Nicole had been together for over 10 years at this point. They were each other’s best friend. Not codependent upon one another, but they made a great team between the two of them. She was young when he met him but he was young at heart and still was. Taking trips for special events and holidays were the few times that they could experience the world together, sharing moments that would last a lifetime.

Together, they found this to be quite uncharted territory. Not often where they chased by goats… but there was that one time with the wild turkeys. It was wild.

This was a different kind of wild. One of those “I don’t believe this to be real” kind of wild. The taste of disbelief was heavy enough to cut a knife through.

“So what do you think was in the water? How much LSD are these hippies dropping on a regular basis to the point that they have no trouble feeding it to us?” Ed was just trying to get Nicole to smile, to realize that the madness was over and they could enjoy the rest of their day without being locked down with fear.

She didn’t respond. Nicole was still in super serious mode, she felt the gravity of the situation. That energetic, spiritual, surreal experiences weren’t ones she particularly liked. Encounters like these were ones that couldn’t be explained with rational logic and that’s what really got her.

Years back, Ed had spent many of his hours visiting and training with an ordained Taoist priest who was also a heavily vetted Karateka who’d been dedicated to his arts for over 30 years. He explained the Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) perspective on life. To summarize, organs were responsible for emotions and health, they were energized by particular types of breath and movement, and residual spirits/energies were real. There were also the 7 levels of heaven and hell, “Satan” had generals and lieutenants, etc. Nicole got to train with him once and was instantly introduced to his ability to understand and manipulate both his and other’s energies when he touched her back from across the room.

After a full day of learning how to strengthen your own energy and use it for day to day life and self defense, food and drink was in order. They were lucky enough to spend the evening in Sensei Tony’s presence, drinking wine and listening to stories. He made mention of exorcisms that he had to conduct, spirits he had to release to the afterlife, and just generally insane shit that you would never believe unless he had “played with your energy.” Mirrors were portals for spirits, they could find a home in them. Strong and malicious energies could invade weaker humans and ruin their lives just by manipulating their thoughts and health. Demons were roaming the Earth before humans were really in existence. To put it bluntly, the spirit world was nothing to be fucked with. Wu-Tang would agree.

“Ed, I just want to go home. I don’t like being out here, the energy isn’t good, and I don’t want anything following us home. If we stick around here, there’s going to be something… an attachment… an energy… I just don’t want it.” Nicole’s voice quivered as she spoke. The words were hard for her to muster and drained her to form the coherent thought, but she was direct in her message. Since she worked so hard to be clear in her demeanor, he felt it was important to take it more serious than usual.

“Yeah, I get that, sweetheart…. but pizza!”

They had only heard of this pizza place for the years they had been cooking on their frozen crusts. A month ago, they decided to visit the restaurant in which they were originated in. To their dismay, the restaurant had closed on Ed’s birthday for a short break to reward their staff. It was really the only thing he wanted for his birthday and he proclaimed they’d return next month… and they did.

“I know, Ed… I know. They don’t open until 4pm and it’s 10am now. So much has happened in the past hour, what if it keeps at this pace?” She was starting to bend, but only because she just wanted to accomplish their mission of having the pizza they set out to have a month ago. She knew it was fairly important to him and it was her only rationale for risking her own well being… for pizza.

Nicole was a very genuine human being. She was open, caring to everyone around her, would give someone an hour to tell her a story with no meaning or punchline… just to be a good person she’d do anything she could. Unfortunately, with no shield up at all, other energies could and would attach. They would use her energy to carry themselves and strengthen their force. Malicious, selfish, and negative energies that no longer had any right here…

His mind was always centered around food. Whether it be where they’re eating now or on the next meal. “Let’s go to the brunch place. They’ve got bomb coffee and make a mean omelet. Plus, I don’t think anything else will be riproaring open at 10am on a Monday morning,” Ed said through his rumbling stomach.

The car turned, stopped, and accelerated all the way to Brunch Place for what felt like hours. Realistically, it was a half mile drive with a lot of impatient foot-tapping and fidgeting.

Something about the slight hangover and the fact that they were still technically on vacation, made his pants smaller. She was driving and he was engaging some of his more primitive intuition. His hand reached across the center console and onto her leg. She felt maybe that he was trying to make her feel better, and he was, just not in the same innocent sense that she had thought. It dawned on her quickly when she felt his hand slide up her slightly torn denim leggings.

“We’re here. Stop it.” Nicole slapped his hand away as the car slammed into park.

Aaaah fuck it… there’s always later. Maybe after a morning bite and some coffee she’ll loosen up.

His stomach’s excitement for food superseded his dick’s excitement for action. He almost floated into the breakfast nook like Donald Duck following the scent to the pie on the window. The door ripped open with a jingle of the bells hung above and the bustle of the diner was immediately apparent. Smells of bacon, eggs, coffee, and pastries shot up their noses. Endorphins started to wipe their memory of the strangeness of last night and this morning. Hell, just the smell of bacon eradicates any and all hangovers. That’s an actual medical truth. Maybe.

Halloween is over, freaks. Time to leave the costume at home and get back to reality.

The waitstaff was still wearing their outfits. In fact, even the cooks in the back were still dressed up in their Halloween garb. Spiderweb decorations still hung from the walls, a couple orange and purple string lights illuminated their surroundings, and there must have been a fog machine still pumping somewhere. Is Halloween actually honored on Monday because it fell on a Sunday? Like when Christmas falls on a weekend they actually observe it on a Monday or Friday because we need the extra day off. Halloween’s a weird one, it’s more of a kid’s holiday but I guess we can all dress up an extra day… to each their own.


Ed shook his head out of the clouds and followed the witch to their table in the corner. Literally, she was a witch. Her face was lightly dusted in makeup and her eyes were seductive in nature. She wore a pointy black hat and had a long satin robe somewhat hid her attractive body. The long black hair was real, lustrous and shiny. Ed and Nicole fell into their booth in the nook and immediately perused the menu after he stole a few moments of staring at her curves. He decided on his an omelet filled with avocado, peppers, and steak with a side of bacon and endless cup of coffee. Nicole’s decision making was a little slower, she apparently had not fantasized about it all morning like he had. With his mind made up, he was able to finally indulge in people watching. She wasn’t the only cute witch kicking around on the waitstaff. There were a few and they all had attractive features in one way or another. He felt the drool and quickly wiped it off his mouth that he found slightly agape.

Ed’s leaned back onto the wall where it met the front window. Out his peripherals he could see the gorgeous landscape that the small town offered. The sun hit the crawling mountain landscape while the clouds turned some pine trees darker than others. Brick, three and four story buildings gave the stores somewhere to call home while acting as curtains to the mountains behind them. If only we could stay here forever… it’s all so breathtakingly stunning.

“We can accommodate you with that,” their witch interrupted his train of thought, almost like she was responding to it. She was staring directly at him.

“Thank you,” Nicole placed her menu down and also started to stare across the table at Ed. Oh..

He looked back at his witchress, errr WAITress about to place his order. His mind drifted into her deep brown eyes, unable to see where her pupils met the color. The curtains on his vision started to close as he went down the tunnel of his eyesight. Before he was able to speak or act, all he could see were her eyes. He was paralyzed and saw nothing but black. The menu firmly gripped, his feet flat on the floor, his ass on the seat, it was all unchangeable in the moment. Time lost value… this moment was either 20 minutes long or half a second… he couldn’t tell.

“There’s no rush… please take as long as you’d like,” he heard her say with a devious smile to the tone of her voice.

Uh oh.

About krisoakey

Simply a man playfully chasing enlightenment while encouraging others to join him through mockery, logical anomalies, and hand holding...LOTS of hand holding
This entry was posted in fiction, Goats, Flies, Berkshires, Uncategorized and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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